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What's in your box?

{BTW I was never that happy moving...EVER!!!}

We have this unpacked box in our house.  I am pretty sure everyone has one from their last move.  Whether it be from 6 months, 6 years or 16 years ago - it's there somewhere.  It's that one last box that they never got to.  But if you never got to "it', what are the chances that you even need what is in it? 

Do you know what is packed inside it?  Has it been sent to the dark, damp basement to get water logged in many rain storms?  To the attic to get chewed up by mice or moths?  Or is in your closet tucked way in the back under all the other junk that you keep piling on top of it?  Or is it like mine and just sitting straight out in your dining room for the world to see?

It says, "Look it me...I am the box that has not been opened.  I hold the contents that you NEEDED to transport around with you thru the last 4 moves in 12 years and you still didn't open.  I am not labeled except for my generic UHAUL stamping.  I have seen you thru the birth of 3 children, 1 marriage and 1 divorce, the purchase and sale of a house and the roller coaster of your career.  And every night I listen to you and your children gather around the dining room table eating dinner, discussing the days events and sharing dreams, joys and tears.  I am a part of your family and yet I am still just a box.

You refuse to open me because of the unknown of what is inside me.  I am admittedly pretty heavy in weight.  If I was THAT important, I would have been marked so.  What are you afraid of that you will find inside me?  I am a box..nothing more!"


Our unopened boxes are metaphors for life.  We are afraid of the unknown.  Opening "Pandora's Box" for me could potentially contain something I may not want to address.  However, it could also hold something as simple as dishes.  LOL!  If I just throw the box in the dumpster, this box would no longer be an issue.  Since it has been 12 years that I haven't opened or addressed it and have no idea what's inside, I might as well just throw it out.  I have nothing to lose at this point since nothing IMPORTANT is missing from my life.  Or is there?



the first step is admitting you have a problem..

i have a problem...i am addicted to food that makes me sick.
i spent 35 years eating lots of bread and milk, cheese and cookies.
then, i had this perfect baby.
he got sick with the most horrible eczema known to man that would not go away.
after pleading with the pediatrican, she performed a RAST allergy test.
he tested positive for egg whites, dairy, wheat and peanuts.
he was 8 months old then.
i was still breastfeeding so i eliminated all those things from my diet as well.
his eczema cleared up immediately.  the dark circles under his eyes disappeared.  his poops were less painful too.
and i lost 40 lbs - really fast.  i felt amazing.  i was allergic too!  who knew?  all my "stomach issues" growing up were this?
that was 8 months ago.
but sure enough i fell off the wagon.  not immediately, not even for the holidays.
more like during extreme stress about a month ago.
and now i am "sick" again and detoxing.
memo to self......remember how you feel now...and think TWICE, THREE TIMES, FOUR TIMES...before you put another piece of toxic food in your mouth ever again!!


What do YOU call this animal?

This cute, sleepy child (age 16 months)... 

has decided that this animal....

is called a....

MAMA  ! ? !

LOL...A mama to someone/thing/calf and while it does provide milk to its young and others, I wonder if my baby is viewing me as an open all night Dairy Queen???  Blizzard anyone???


7 Things I Have Learned During The Last 7 Days

1. I have tried to make my bedroom a "Big Girl Room" and get away from my classic shabby chic/cottage style with shades of pink, aqua and white. I have learned that any other colors in my bedroom just don't work for me. I am who I am. And I like me - for the most part on a good day!

2. Any project that starts out with "How hard can it be?" is never a good thing.  Do your research but not too much. Too much preparation stifles the creative process!

3. While I am all about being natural in terms of toys, clothing, food, skin care, raising my children and being crunchy in general, something I can not seem to totally embrace anymore is natural cleaning products. I have tried various brands, homemade recipes and now have given up cleaning althogether because I am so frustrated! I am back to Soft Scrub, Tide for the Boys clothes and Lysol to sanitize with!

4. I refuse to pay full price, half price or even discounted prices for MY clothing anymore after shopping at Savers and the Salvation Army. Yes, I do buy my underwear, socks and bras new although I have been wearing the same Bravado nursing bras since I became pregnant with James. Anything else is such a waste. I have just become so thrifty when it comes to myself. I will however spend $40 on a new diaper for the baby or even $65 for a pair of Sustainablebabyish wool pants. But I do also score great deals for them at those joints too!  Pictures to follow of todays scores.

5. My hair looks best in a short bob. Unlayered! Thank You...please don't ever convince me otherwise!!

6. Crock Pot liners are a must for me. Otherwise, I will not clean that damn thing for several days weeks after I use it. It will become a science experiment - and I hated Science growing up!

7. Blogging is so much more time consuming than I thought. I said to myself, "How hard could it be?" Well, life has a way of creeping up on you and this definately got pushed to the back burner. Hell, a shower got pushed to the back burner for several days. So while I may not get to blog every day, my ideas continue to backup in my brain and hope that it automatically saves a copy of each draft until I can come and upload it here.

Until next time,


Martin Luther King Jr. 2011

photo via africawithin.com
On this day we celebrate Dr Martin Luther King's Birthday, I share with you my favorite MLK quote.   

“Let no man pull you low enough to hate him.” –Paul’s Letter to American Christians

This is so fundamental in my life as it has been filled with lots of challenges that have made me hate others and myself along the way.  We must love ourselves first and only then we can give freely, teach properly, respect openly and love one another as God has taught us.


technical difficulties in an effort to look pretty

sometimes lipstick looks crappy in a shade on you that looks good in the tube!

no clue what I'm doing here...calling in the geek squad, aka..boy #2 to help in the am....stay tuned!

Gratitude Sunday

Today I was inspired by a smashed left over fortune cookie on my dining room table that I was going to throw out.  After looking at it all day, this is what I came up with...

"Even a crushed fortune cookie has a powerful message inside to deliver."  -me   

Pretty much sums up how I feel about a very important little person is my life who has been thru more than anyone should at his age and yet still manages to deliver a powerful message, even inspirational at times, to all of us!


Playoff Weekend

Football plays a large part of our life.  My oldest 2 boys have been playing for several years now and the baby has been on a football field since he was 5 days old.  He could even say TOUCHDOWN at 11 months old.  So, it's no surprise during this playoff weekend that our TV's are on in all the rooms so we don't miss a hit play.

Game 1

Ravens @ Steelers - The Ravens are my second favorite team in the NFL since I love Ray Lewis and his hard hitting ways!  But unfortunately they lost!  There is always next year.  :-(

Game 2

Green Bay @ Falcons - I really couldn't care less about this game except that we are considering moving to Atlanta.  Could this be our team in the near future???

Game 3

Jets @ New England - This is the most important game of the weekend to us since the Pats are our home team.  Brady looks good.  In the words of Will and Optimus, "Autobots, roll out!"

Game 4

WHO, WHAT, WHERE???  This is where I stop caring because it has to do with the NFC.

15 years from now, I will be sitting in a sky box somewhere watching one of my children play during one of these playoff games.  Surrounded by better food, more comfortable furniture, cheering just as loud and still not caring who is playing for the NFC!  Go Pats!!!


I give you my son, Ophiuchus!

Buyenlarge / Getty Images
Yesterday news broke that there is a new Zodiac sign.  Apparently, Will has crossed over.  He is now an Ophiuchus.  He was once a Sagittarius born the last day of November, but alas the higher powers that be have decided that zodiacally (LOL) and scientifically this is no longer true.  So what the heck does that mean?  I have no idea!?!  I myself changed as well from a Virgo to a Leo in this reorganization.  I'm a hardcore Virgo.  That's my story and I'm sticking to it!

I always knew Will liked reptiles but this brings new meaning to Snake Holder!  PS:::  Did I mention how much he loves the word "apparently" and how much I love the word "zodiacally"?

William, 2004


Top 3 of the Day

It was another no school snow day here following yet another blizzard. 

Our top 3 moments of the day were:

1) TT proclaiming the Nutcracker on my shirt from the Festival Ballet was the Nut "Cookie".

2)  Harry thanking me for the great work I was doing with my plan.  I  explained to him it was all his strategy at work and HE was the one doing all the hard work!  I received a HUGE hug and lots of tears!  A MIRACLE INDEED!!!

3)  Saw a homeless man at 4:02PM on the way home from Target  standing in a pile of snow on the side of the road.  He stands in the same place everyday.  Today he was rocking back and forth without gloves in 29 degree weather with a whoknowswhat wind chill.  My mom and I looked at each other and decided we must act.  I quickly turned the car around, drove to D&D and picked up a large Hot Chocolate.  My mom prepared her gloves and the boys prepared their popcorn from Target to give to the man.  When we got there at 4:09PM, he was gone and nowhere in sight.  The boys insisted we go search for him and follow his footprints in the snow.  If only it was that easy.  The truth is, he probably had to be back by sundown to the shelter to get a bed. 

I think my children are finally learning that not all people are as fortunate as we are and have the family that supports them when times are tough.   Our family does not have a lot of anything, but we have each other and we have love.  We have the commitment to always be there for each other.  We must take care of each other as a family, as a local community and as a global nation.  We must love each other in good times and love each other even more when it hurts.    xoxo


Baby Feet

Baby Feet from 1 year ago.   He has grown so much and our lives have changed.  But for today he is still my Baby.


Best Friends

I am so glad I had my children fairly young - mid 20's and then 35 for the baby.   This has given my children the opportunity to bond and learn from their grandparents and great grandmother.  My extended family is very small.  But those people are VERY important to me.

What is most important in this family dynamic is my oldest son and I share a bond that goes far beyond words.  We share the bond of having the same best friend - but it is not each other.  Our best friend is my mother.

She has been there for me through thick and thin and everything in between.  However, her first connected experience with my oldest son started at his birth in March 1999.  She was the first one to hold him when he was born not breathing and gray when the doctor repeated for what seemed like minutes on end, "Come on baby, BREATHE, BREATHE!"

Today she is there for him when he needs someone to listen without being judgemental, someone to put him on the bus every morning, someone to stand on the football field in the dark in the cold October night cheering after a long hard practice and someone who as his godmother guides him spiritually to become a better young man than he already is.

I love my mother and think she is the most awesome woman I know, not because she is my mother.  Because she is really is ONE COOL CHICK!!




I must say this to my 15 month old 30 times a day.

My little man just loves the fridge.  He tries to find things in there (Jimmy Hoffa??), plays with the Silk creamer, hides blocks, pulls out the old rotting whatever that is hiding in the fruit bin (clementine perhaps??) and the attempts to answer the age old question, "Does the light bulb stay on even when the door is closed?"

Anyway, last night after the millionth time of saying STAY OUT, I found him like this.  And this time I told him to STAY PUT!!!  Don't grow up baby - I love you just the way you are!


Tardy to the Party but I'm here!!!


So I'm jumping on the bandwagon. The Blogging bandwagon. The 365 day project bandwagon. The always late to the technology party bandwagon. But the fact is, I am here.

I have always been the one who eventually "finds" technology and uses it. I just "find" it later than most. I guess you have to be in a social circle of people who talk about these things. I am not. I guess you have to watch the news, read the paper, open a magazine or log onto a news website once a year to know whats happening.

I really don't have the time for things like that. Single mom here. 3 boys. Busy, active BOYS!!! Did I mention BOYS?!!

So, I'm just going to jump in head first not knowing what I'm doing and post a picture from last night of 2 of my boys asleep. So peaceful! The middle one is going thru his cranky, hormonal stage (boys do that???) and the youngest is teething still (when will this end????). So the fact it is quiet in the house is a blessing.

I think they are faking! That's what makes the picture even better!!!!